Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

did you hear about the guy who got his left leg and left arm cut off? he's all right now

what's the difference between a jew and a pizza? a jew is a member of a religion called Judaism, they're generally tall and have curly hair, however not in all situations is this true. They celebrate Chanukah and passover and many other holidays. Pizza is an italian dish, it's round, has red sauce and cheese on it and is pretty tasty.

you know what? CHICKEN BUTT. butt of chicken ahahahaa

Some woman's like "Make me a sandwich!" Some guy's like "No way!" The woman says "Or I'll rape you!" "Allright. Fine with m... Wait... I thought women didn... I mean couldn.. you know.." "Rape?" "No, eat sandwiches!"

Why did the mexican immigrant have no friends? He lacked social skills and was unfamiliar with American mannerism's.

Here is the worst joke ever. ..... Dislike this and you are awesome!! P.S. I'm serious. I want to make a joke with the MOST DISLIKES ever! Don't think this is reverse psychology. I don't do that shi*t.

Q: How do you solve a problem like Maria. A: You kill her. You kill Maria.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car. -Tag

What did one pare say to the other ... ... WE MAKE A GREAT PARE!!!

Q: What cant you give a black guy? A: Black eye, lips, and a jon

what has balls and is long and suckible? Spaghetti

my goldfish never writes me back when i send him letters

What's worse than losing a contact Having a bloody stool

How do you sink a Polish submarine? Hit it with a torpedo.

why did Sally fall of the swing....she had no arms. knock knock who's there? NOT Sally.....

how do you kill a blonde?? put a scratch n sniff on the bottom of a pool

Why can't Johnny ride a bike? Because Johnny is a potato.

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

A baby seal walks into a club.

why is this joke funny because your laughing

What did the drunk man say to the average civilian? Blahaahahahahahuhuh!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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