Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a dog, Meow.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who's there?

How do you make a girl scout cry? Steal her cookies

The EPA.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is deceased, therefore rendering her incapable of movement, which is required to drive a vehicle.

What do you do when you do what the do is the do for the do to do what you're doing that's done for what she did if you didn't do what not to do? ^error

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

Whats red and smells like Bacon. Bacon

you know why Michael J Fox makes the best milkshakes? no... but his milkshakes brings all the boys to the yard

Knock knock Come in

Error 37.

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends how hard you throw them.

Paul Walker: Breaks, stop Breaks: No

What did the screwdriver do when it was insulted? It got up and walked away.

Q: What's worse than seeing a scorpion A: being stung by that scorpion

finding out that when you had sex with that prostitute, you severely injured your urethra tube and you cannot create urine or spurm.

How did Justin Bieber die? He didn't. And we all need to stop making fun of that poor boy.

Why did Jane's parachute not open? Because a plane hit her on the way down.

Why isn't this a joke? Because it's not.

When life gives you lemons, you're probably at Mr. Life's fruit stand over on Imperial Avenue.

Which square is small and yellow? The small, yellow square.

Why do black people drink cool-aid? Because it tastes good.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who Doctor Octagonapus! BLAAAUUUUGGGHHHH

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...