Whats the difference between a soccer ball and a baby? Babies cry when I kick them.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar, but they're wearing normal people clothes, so no one notices or says anything funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Two black guys run into a bank with guns. They place them in their pre-payed safety deposit boxes and continue on their way as they were falling behind on their schedule.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Did you hear about the guy that lost the whole left side of his body? Well, he's all right.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did a kid throw a clock out the window? Because he was adopted

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? One. Though if the ladder is rickety and she needs someone to steady it for her, two.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Your parents shouldn't have met. I was thinking that as I contemplated suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A rat and a pig rape a puppy. Hey, that's just life.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did Aladin say to Mulan? Nothing. Although they are both Disney characters, they never appear in the same film, and therefore never communicate.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Fuck off, seriously, if your name is Tifa, my name is bah, I got better things to do.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

You dropped something.... Yo lip

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How did the old man die? His family locked him in the basement and then burned the house

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. What? You are about to die and be eaten. Asshole! i will murder you first!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the strawberry say to the grape? Nothing, inanimate objects can't use verbal communication.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops