What did the rapist say to the child? Contrary to popular belief, I am just a kind old man that likes to hand out sweets to disadvantaged young children. I only got dubbed a rapist when a child crawled into the back of my van as I drove off; the fact that his abusive father was the one who raped him is not my fault.

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Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? They're really good at it

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What happends when two gay guys want to have kids? They can't, so they go to an orphanage and adopt one.

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What do you say to the man break dancing?? You don't, call an ambulance he is having an epileptic fit.

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Excuse me sir, do you know where I can find the restroom? I don't know, I'm sorry.

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What do black people and asians have in common? arms

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What is the difference between Julis Ceaser, and the moon? The moon is covered in rocks and craters, and Julis Ceaser is DEAD

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A Pogo Stick

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Why did the child say he had been a ubused. Answer: because he had been.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he was told he would never find a wife

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How to open an orange? You don't you peal it

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Why did Emily sit in a lonely corner? Because she just wanted to okay!

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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When is it unlucky to see a black cat? When you are a mouse.

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A black guy, a Mexican, an Arab and a white guy walk into a room and embrace cultural diversity.

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I just started the seafood diet. It consists primarily of eating fish due to its high nutritional content.

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Why don't sharks attack lawyers? Professional Courtesy

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ill take a bullet for you... on call of duty... nahhh that ruins my kd

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How did the black man get into college? A mop.

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Why was the Asian woman late for work? She was raped.

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why did the geman man hit the jewish man? because the jewish man swung a punch at the german man so it was an act of self defense.

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Q:What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A:Lick-a-lotta-pus

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A girl asks a Croatian bartender for a beer, the bartender replies, 'There is no beer in this bar.'

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I have two coins in my hand that add up to 30 cents, and one of them is not a nickel. I accidentally dropped them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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