What is pink and fuzzy? Pink fuzz

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What's white and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A refrigerator.

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What's green and invisible? Nothing; green and all other colours of the rainbow have wavelengths that occur specifically in the visible range of the electromagnetic spectrum. Therefore any invisible object cannot be green.

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What do you get if you convict a white man of murder? A black man in prison.

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A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Ben." Ben who?" "Ben Dover!" "Ben,it's been 7 years. I already moved on and have a new husband and family. Stop coming here or I'm calling the police."

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An Jewish man worked at a bank, and ate chicken noodles for lunch and then stabbed and man playing the saxophone.

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Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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What does the Bill in Bill Clinton stand for? Bilious.

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How does Hitler tie his shoes? with little Nazis!

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam.

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Why was the prostitute's throat sore? Allergies.

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The doctor said to the boy that a spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down. He is diabetic.

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Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

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knock knock who's there BANG!! BANG!! BANG!! BANG!! who OPEN THE DOOR ITS THE POLICE

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What's brown and sticky? "A stick?" No, poo.

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Why did the man visit 4chan? He heard about it from a coworker and was curious about what it was.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Poop. Poop who? HAHAHAHAHAHA you said poopoo

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what did the guy say when he lost his sandwich? wheres my sandwich?

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how do you tune a piano, you dont, piano tuners tune a piano, I wasn't talking to you!

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Why did the woman get into a car accident? She was blind.

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What happens when a man goes to college? He gets a degree and graduates most of the time or he fails miserably.

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whats brown and stick? brown paint that has not dried yet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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