How do you make a baby understand what you want? You color yourself purple, wear a yellow shirt, and do cart wheels while singing "The wheels on the bus go 'round and 'round!"

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When it comes ro the zodiac my grandmother was a cancer and... She ws killed by... A giant crab

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Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

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i have a black man in my family tree. i am 25% african american among several other ethnicities.

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Life is confusing. Really how so? He just walked up to me five minutes ago with a pair of socks taped on both sides of his face saying humanity is screwed and ran off after peeing on my carpet.

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Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

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WHAT DOES A NUMBER DO WHEN IT'S HORNE? MATHDERBATION

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Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

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Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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why didn't sue come to her son's baseball game? because he doesn't play baseball, he lost his arms in a horrible plane crash. besides, sue died in that accident anyway.

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Why don't you make like a tree, and get out of here.

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Q:what do you get when you get when you cross a dog and a human A: a human-dog hybrid with AIDS

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

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What's worse than 6 dead babies in a trash can? More than 6.

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What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

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An Anthony eats a juicy pickle.

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What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who is driving? They take turns due to the fact it is a long trip.

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What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

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How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

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i punched my mother in the face once she cried

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Why did timmy's face turn red? Early that morning Timmy was brutally attacked by the local street gang which proceeded to smack timmy's face with a baseball bat and smearing the blood with a dirty rag.

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what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops