Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin Holy shit a talking muffin

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Why did the mouse cross the road? Because he had been attached to the chicken with a nail gun.

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what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

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Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level? I can't remember... :(

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A cat walks into a bar. He orders some beer. The bartender asks, why the sad face. The cat replies, "I got laid off"

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What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger....... unless it is a nonkiller disease that makes you extremely weak :D

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Stop driving smart cars you fags

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What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

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What's black and white and red all over? A greyish red object.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who is driving? They take turns due to the fact it is a long trip.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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I dyed my armpit hair blue yesterday because I wanted to start a new trend. My boyfriend later broke up with me.

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A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

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what do you get when a white man and a black woman have a baby? A baby

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When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

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i actually read the terms of service before i posted this

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What did the big Chimney say to the little Chimney? Nothing they are chimneys ....

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How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, unless he's short. Then, he'll need a friend to hold the ladder for him.

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why did the mexican work for a lawn care service I don't know why don't you ask him

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Q. What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car. A. Get in the car.

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What did the gay man die of? Obesity.

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A teenage girl walks into a bar. She sits down and watches the TV up against the wall. The bartender walks by and says "Hello, do you have I.D." The girl says "No, I'm just here waiting for my ride." The bartender then says "Well I'm sorry to have to tell you this but you gotta be 21 or over to sit in the bar." The girl says "Okay, but is there anywhere I can wait that is safe?" The bartender asks "Why?" and the girl replies "Well, I've been hiding from my ex boyfriend. I just broke up with him an hour ago. He was very controlling and he is still not over me. So now I'm here waiting for my new boyfriend." The bartender says "What you have a new boyfriend already? Maybe that's why your ex was angry." The girl says "yeah, I know, oh look there's my ride. It was nice talking with you, have a good night."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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