Why did little jimmy fall of the playground? He was blind and wasn't aware of his surroundings

Why couldn't the blond dial 911? She lost her arms in a tragic car accident last year

It's not gay until eyes meet or tips touch.

How do you scare Sarah Palin? You chase her around with a chainsaw while wearing a Jason mask.

There's two blondes a black man and a camera man...

Roses are red The grass is green I want you in my bed If you know what I mean.

whats the similarities between an xbox and michael jackson? there both made of plastic and they both get turned on by children

"Why did the chicken cross the road? ... To get to your house. Knock knock." "Who's there?" "The chicken"

Whats something really annoying? A guy who presses enter too much. hehe

I just flew in from New Zealand, and boy am I tired. It was a really long flight and I found it incredibly difficult to sleep in those seats, so I didn't bother and kept myself awake watching in-flight films the whole way.

A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

Someone: I like my coffee like I like my men Someone else: Black? Someone: No, tied up, shoved in a burlap sack, and dragged through the mountains.

What did the disrespectful cow say to his parents? Mooo. I hate you both

what's the difference between northerners and southerners? southerners live to the south of birmingham, and they don,t stink of urine.

Q. What is the worlds biggest lie A. I have read and agree to the terms of service ?

If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, what does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

Why was little timmy crying? He walk in on his dad molesting a minor.

Your mom is so ugly and stupid that people make fun of her and that's not nice.

Obama One Big Ass Mistake America

Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

Q. Why was 6 afraid of 7? A. Because 7 was a scary dude.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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