Malcom: Knock Knock. Jessica: Who's there? Malcom: It's Malcom. Jessica: Okay. Come in.

there are three women witch one is married? the one with the ring on its finger

A black guy. A Jew and a dyke died in a plane crash!:) Who was flying? ....why would you be wondering that when you should be wondering why i put a smile-face beside the details of the crash..

whats worst than finding a worm in your apple???? an apple in your worm.

What's worse than the holocaust? nothing it was a terrible act in history

Why was the drunk man arrested? he beat his wife and was sentenced too 3 months in federal prison

What's clear and looks like water? Water.

A bar walked into a bar. Bars can't walk.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sky diving? I don't know, but that sounds like a highly improbable circumstance.

Why does Shelby Like Pandora? Because she prefers rap and hip hop music and Pandora helps select songs for her to listen to according to her interests.

Reilly and Ross went up to fetch a pale of water when a triceratops turned them into bagels then ate them and later crapped them out....

It's not gay until eyes meet or tips touch.

Why was the All-black Basketball team disqualified? Because they all died in a hotel fire.

roses are red viloites are sour open your legs and give me an hour

What happened to your face It got hit by a bus By cheyenne

Why isn't Hellen Keller a good driver? She's dead.

What do you call a Jew with 20 Pounds of Pennies? A rich man

Knock knock Who's there It's a policeman informing you that your parents have been killed in a car crash. Your Dad, who has been struggling with substance abuse and depression, found out his wife had been cheating on him, and in a drunken rage, wrapped the car around a tree.

ever tried african food? they neither

Jesus walks on water, Humans are 70% water, I can walk on humans, Therefore i am 70% Jesus.

Why did the circus clown lose his balance? He had a seizure while on his unicycle, fell off, and bumped his head, leading to significant blunt trauma in the brain. Weeks later, after waking up from a coma, the doctors discover that he can no longer speak anything other than gibberish. His friends and family decide that he cannot go on living this way and decide to pull the plug.

what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

What do you get when you cross a helicopter, elephant, and a rhino? Heliphino

How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? you open the door and guide him inside

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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