Don't count your eggs before you put them in a basket.

Justin Bieber's voice sounds like Michael J. Fox playing a theramin.

What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

Why'd the cop pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

What is the best part about being a rapist? The orgasms.

why did the baby cross the road? he was stapled to the chicken

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

What does the blond say when she walks out of the salon Nothing, she is hit by a car, and promptly goes into a coma and hasnt said anything since

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 8, 9, 10

What is Hellen Keller's favorite movie? Around the block in 80 days.

What do you call an asian plumber? A plumber.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, your mother has AIDS.

Girl 1- why was 6 afraid of 7? dog- ..................................(doesn't say anything because dogs can't ruff)

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I just sharpened this hatchet Don't make me use it!

Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

Why did the boy let the falling brick hit him in the head? He had no legs, so he could not move

Roses are red, violets are blue, take this medication, and call me if you have any symptoms of nausea or heartburn.

Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

Why did Hitler Commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed by the fact he had lost World War II.

Your momma so fat.... She's at risk of cardiovascular disease. You should take her to a nutritionist.

Shelly tells Rob to go home... Thats what she said

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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