What did one sexy babe say to the other? We are sexy

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Remember that part where Jesus gets angry at a fig three and kills it because it "was lazy" for refusing to grow figs at winter? Brother Jeez, that was kinda mean man! You know it was winter rite? Anti Joke or not, that part is funny, so if Jesus returns and wants you to make him a sammich you better go get that goddamn sammich!

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Suck my bigvagina you faggetass bitchybuns

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Q. What do you call a blonde in a library? A. Lost.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't.

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What's heavier: a kilogramme of steel or a kilogramme of feathers? A kilogramme of steel, because steel is heavier than feathers.

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Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

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What's the difference between a black man and a Ginger? Their pigmentation.

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What's big and messy? A big mess

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Forward this anti-joke to at least 15 people And absolutely nothing extraordinary will happen in the next 10 minutes.

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dallen loves penis

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What did the marshmallow say to the other marshmallow? We are both bananas.

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Denard Robinson

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it doesn't matter, it got turned into KFC before it crossed.

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Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

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A black man walks into a store with a gun. It is a gun store and he needs to buy amunition after using all of his to fend of a home invader, and protect his family. He lives in a bad area because he never went to college and cannot get a well paying job in this economy, so he can't afford to buy a house in a better area He then used the gun to rob a bank. He no longer lives in a poor area

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Knock knock Who's there? It's me It's me who? It's me who is knocking the door

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A man died and went to heaven. Luckily, he was resuscitated by a trained medical professional, and after a stern warning from his doctor, he lost weight, limited the cholesterol in his diet, and went on to live a very happy and healthy life.

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Your mom is so retard that she needs "special help" from medical professionals. :3 <33

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What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

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a man was shot.... he died

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What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

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You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

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a lady says, " i cant stand this." Th guy next to her had his legs blown off and will never be able to stand again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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