What is the biggest lie in the world? I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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What did the worm a fisherman used to catch fish called when the worm killed a trout? Master Bate.

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A man on his 21st birthday walks into a bar. He orders a piña colada. The bartender then replies "Sorry we do not sell piña coladas here." In disappointment, the man decides to order a different alcoholic drink and later becomes an alchoic for 20 years until he breaks his obsession and remarries his wife and has 5 kids. He then had a great life and died at age 92. He will be missed by his wife and children.

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A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to prom. First he goes to get a tux but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he hast to get some flowers so he goes to a florist and there is a huge flower line there. It takes forever but he gets the flowers. Next he heads to get a limo, unfortunately there is a long limo line at the rental office and it takes a long time but he gets the job done. Finally the day of the prom comes and the two are dancing happily and are having a good time. When the song is over she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there is no punchline.

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A black man walks into a bar and orders a shot. He then precedes to drink it.

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What do you call a dead guy under the ocean? Murder.

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Pikachu says "Pikachu!" Squirtle says "Squirtle!" Charmander says "Charmander!" Ash is upset because he cannot communicate with his Pokemon in their foreign tongue.

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What happened to The Guy when he got pissed on he was wet

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What did George Bush say when 9/11 happened? "Silly pilots! The airport isn't in a building!"

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How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

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Q: Why do all Asians have small penises? A: They don't.

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what you get time to go with? - a clock

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what did the doctor say to another doctor? we are doctors

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

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A dad says to his son "you better stop masturbating or youll go blind'. And the son says "dad im over here".

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A man died and went to heaven. Luckily, he was resuscitated by a trained medical professional, and after a stern warning from his doctor, he lost weight, limited the cholesterol in his diet, and went on to live a very happy and healthy life.

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What did the stick of butter say to the lemon? "I'm a stick of butter"

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what's the difference between a duck? one leg's the same.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? One has a slightly darker skin complexion

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What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

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What is the worse joke to tell a Orpahn Knock Knock Whos there not your parents

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Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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"I see London; I see France..." "Wow. You must have exceptional eyesight."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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