What would Osama Bin Laden be doing if he were alive today? Drowning

Little Johnny was walking through the park... only he had no legs. Little Johnny was raped later that day... while he bled out from him having his legs cut.

Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

What's better than "Friday" by Rebecca Black? Hitler's kill/death ratio

How do you make a tissue dance? You give it dance lessons.

Yo momma so fat she has more chins than a Chinese phonebook. Chins in a phonebook? I don't get it.

What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

What is the definition of child abuse? Ms Bazan

What's good about sex with twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because i shot him. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? he was in front of the monkey

One early Christmas morning i went downstairs. My mother told me that she had gotten me the ultimate stocking stuffer. It was a foot

Asked by the court barber how he wanted his hair cut, the king replied: ‘In silence.

Q: Why did the boy have blue balls? A: because the respectable girl with high self esteem refused to give him head.

How many straight naked men can you fit in a wardrobe? I'm not sure but the situation is highly unlikely!

Q. Why did the man get an email? A. Because he checked his inbox.

What's orange and is a loyalist in the orange order? Caoimhin McCann?

Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

what's worse than waiting 45 minutes in an amusement park ride? getting your penis chopped off.

Whats wrong with me? Your alive.

Q:What did the midget say to the toll booth operator? A: Is your family dead too?

One day 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

What is worse that a bee sting? 2 bee stings what is worse that 2 bee sting? Kony what is wose than Kony? 3 bee stings what is worse than 3 bee sting? being allergic to bee stings

What do you call a man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk? A man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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