Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

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My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

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Allah walked into AK Bar

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Why was the little boy hit by a bus? I pushed him

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Whats Brown, Long and is on every black man? Legs

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I guy goes into a coffee shop and says I'll have a coffee and a danish. The clerk says we're all out of danish. The guy says I'll just have the danish then.

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Koolaid is red, Poweraid is blue, Gatorade is yellow, My urine is brown... looks like i have a bladder infection.

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What did the first Ethiopian say to the other? He asked for some food only to realize that the other one had already starved to death.

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Wanna hear the orphan joke knock knock who's there? not you parents

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WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

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A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

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What song does the lady camel sing to seduce male camels - my humps my humps my humps my humps How did sergay the camel respond? -we dont know. He died a fatal death involving hippos in hula skirts, and flying guavas

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Why did the man hit the little boy? His brakes failed.

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3 Men walk into a bar, they all order up a drink. And then they paid their tabs and left.

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Why did Anti-Joke.com close down? It didn't. If your reading this, the site is fully operational and up to date with your system.

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what did one gay guy say to the other gay guy? want to suck dicks? (cause that's what gays do)

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What is small, red all over and gets shorter by the second? A baby cutting its hair with a potato peeler

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If I was in a room with hitler Osama bin laden and Justin bieber and a gun with 2 bullets. I would shoot Justin bieber twice

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What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

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Q. What's long and hard and full of seamen? A. A penis. Oops, I misspelled "semen". Sorry. Also, to clarify, this doesn't describe the normal state of the average penis. Usually they are flaccid, and they can only be said to be "full of semen" at the exact moment of ejaculation.

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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An over weight person is diagnosed with anorexia they used to be fatter

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What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

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quiz is to quizzicle as test is to test___.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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