I am strangling you. Do you see my arms? I AM FREAKEN STRANGLING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

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So a crippled guy rolls into a bar..

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Q: What happened to the monkey when he jumped off the tree. A: He died Q: Why did the second monkey jump off of the tree A: He was attatched to the first monkey Q: Why did the third monkey jump off the tree A: Peer Pressure

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Why is red? He was just murmured by a phycopath.

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Male orgasm (haha bitches we've been faking it)

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Why is did the blonde cross the road? She was trying to catch the chicken.

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A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the glass from the other man and throws it on the with all his power to the floor. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

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What did the man think of when he saw a squadron of military bombers flying over his home? The football game is about to start

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Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Niether did she

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wanna hear a joke? womans rights

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Knock knock! Who's there? Alan okay come in

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What's black and really really smelly? Martin Luther King Jr.'s grave.

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What's easier than taking candy from a baby? Almost nothing.

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Why are AntiJokes so funny? Because your brain analyses them and makes you laugh.

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my ilkshake brings all the boys in the yard. and the local health inspector's like , have you got a permit to be selling dairy beverages from a home based business?

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A man walked into a bar. He sat down, had a nice meal and went home relatively satisfied.

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What does a Somalian want for Christmas? Nothing hes Sunni Muslim and does not celebrate Christmas

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What happens when you tickle a rabid iguana? It bites you and you die.

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Why was Jimmy upset? He wasn't.

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A Palestinian woman walks into a library. She is promptly stoned to death.

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What's hot and cold at the same time? Hotcold.

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What's black and hanging on a tree in my backyard? Blackberries.

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So a guy says to his dog "hey man when you piss in the toilet can you please flush, just because I don't like to look at your pee." then the dog sits back and says "...woof !!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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