Knock knock. Who's there? the police.

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero? Because it is impossible, the answer is undefined.

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1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

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Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

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Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

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Two muffins are in an oven. They say absolutely nothing because they're muffins and not sentient.

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Wanna hear the most repeated joke on anti jokes? Why did [insert name here] fall off the swing? Because he/she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not [insert name here].

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I? Everett

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What did Billy say to Jesus when he died? Nothing he went to hell. -Austin Conradt

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How do you make your father cry? Poke him in the eye with a shovel, then continue to lower his self esteem with insults.

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What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

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A man walks into a bar. I don't remember the rest, but your mother's a whore.

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What did the chicken say to the cow? Cluck cluck Knock knock Who's there Chicken Chicken who? Chicken go cluck cluck, cow go moo Piggie go oink oink, how 'bout you?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

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Comedian: Do you all wanna hear a joke? Audience: Yeah!!! Comedian: Okay! What did the bad comedian say to the audience? Audience: What?!! Comedian: Chicken butt. Thank you, you've been a great crowd. Good night!

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2 biggest lies I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service and That baby dont look like me

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yo momma is so fat that she contributes to americas obesity problem

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A redhead walks into a bar and goes to the restroom. She needed to pee.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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Why did the man steal the little girl? He didn't. She was his daughter and they were driving home after picking up the groceries.

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Knock knock Who's there? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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What is just as important as Woman's Rights? Woman's Lefts, to maintain equality.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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