What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

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What did the dog say to the mailman? Woof.

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You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

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How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

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What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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How many light bulbs? 1

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What's upside down? umop apisdn

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Why didn't Fred answer his phone? Because Fred is a tree.

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Why couldn't Gladice get out of bed? Because she was dead!

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knock knock come in

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What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

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How did the mom quiet her screaming baby? She threw it out the window.

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A little boy walks into a bar its fine, he's over 21, he just looks younger.

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A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

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Two Jews walk into a pub. They don't order a ham sandwich.

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What did Jesus say to the jews? Fuck you.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 beat the crap out of 8.

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whats the difference between a frog and a toad ones a frog

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What did the black man drink on a hot summer day? Some water, it quickly replenished the liquids he was perspiring do to the temperature being sufficiently hotter than his body temperature

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How many black basketball players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're all rather tall therefore they can reach the light source with ease.

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Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He calls the right number.

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What make's a constuction worker drop's his hammer? MC Hammer moves.

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What did the man with no head say to the women?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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