How many squirrels does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Who cares? Why would a squirrel need to change a lightbulb?

Josh Groban, John Mayer, Ben Folds and Nick Cave are at an underground club that specialises in lithuanian folk music and siberian vodka. end of story

knock knock. who's there? doctor. doctor who? doctor: you have cancer.

why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

Roses are red My name is Dave This poem doesn't make sense Potato

Dont joke about the holocaust. My grandfather died there, he fell off the guard tower.

Why were our jokes deleted? Because it's anti-joke.

i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

What do you call a black guy doing community service? Someone who wanted to give back. Stop being racist.

Then I contracted bronchitis from the smoke. Unfortunately I don't not have time to visit a doctor to mend this debilitation. In fact, nobody does.

How do you get four gay guys to sit on one barstool? It's quite difficult, it would be easier to just get 3 more barstools.

What is the opposite of a joke ? Racism

What did the man say before he died? I am going to die.

Bill: Wanna know the difference between knowledge and wisdom? Joe: Sure Bill: Knowledge is knowing that an apple is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad.

What happened to the little girl who fell into the lake? She was rescued and made a complete recovery.

A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

Mother Mary held her daughter 20 minutes under water. Not to save her from her troubles, just to see the funny bubbles

What do you call a person who kills there own child? Casey Anthony.

How did the Mexican get across the boarder? He applied for a student visa. He was a promising young scholar who had no trouble being accepted to a prestigious college.

Q: a man in a camry runs over his wife. who's fault is it? A: toyota and their breaks.

Why did he chicken cross the road? The suicide rate in chickens has gone up 50% in the past year alone.

Why did the farmer cross the road? To catch the chicken

A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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