What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

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How could you tell Adam and Eve wasn't black? ANSWER--YOU WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO TAKE A RIB FROM A BLACK MAN. ISSAIAH FROM OHIO YOLO:]

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roses are red violets are blue start sucking my dick or ill kill you

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give me a gun or i will shoot you i dont know what with but i will kill you so run run or i will come and get you

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Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

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How do you cause ultimate pain to a imprisoned Jew during the holocaust? Moral: You give him an apple WITH a worm in it.

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Why did the ginger go to hell? Because after all the bullying she endured for her hair color, she felt her only option was to commit suicide.

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Superman and Batman get in a fight, who wins? No one the world has just lost a superhero.

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Q: What's the difference between a Boyscout and a Jew? A: Boyscouts come home from camp.

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In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

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What is Cleopatra's favorite cookie? A: Chips Ahoy

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What's blue and wiggles? A baby in a bag

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Several of our "name brothers" have been attacked threatened and questioned almost every night since when we last talked on the phone, it turns out that these people are not after me. But after you, they have no idea that I retired years ago, and while their information is limited, you got yourself someone that is selling information on the deep web intentionally, as far as we know he might be selling you out piece by piece, and as of this point, you might be in dire danger.

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What's worse than putting stones in a blender? Putting a baby in a blender.

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How do you know when it is a Mexican's birthday? They are walking around with "happy birthday" balloons.

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Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

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Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

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A dad says to his son "you better stop masturbating or youll go blind'. And the son says "dad im over here".

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Sally bought a shakeweight. She is an alcoholic and is ruining her family.

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What do you call a deer with no eye? NO IDEAR!

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What do you call a flat-chested woman with a penis? A man.

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What's more absurd than a goldfish astronaut? A jew that cares about palestinians

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have STD's, Now so do you!

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There's this traveling merchant from Flint, MI. He goes door to door trying to sell shampoo. He is having a lot of trouble selling shampoo in Flint because they were hit hard during the recession and now ahve trouble affording even the most seemingly cheap products.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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