I got 99 problems, and most of them involve my terminal illness.

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69.

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Why did the asain fail his tests? They weren't math tests...

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Ask me if I want an orange. Do you want an orange? No.

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Whats worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who are we kidding, when have you ever seen a chicken crossing a road?

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Your mom is so nerdy that she probably went to college, got her degree, then found a very successful job in a field that she finds interesting.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'why the long face?'. The horse does not answer as it cannot speak or even understand english. It was later destroyed by the government.

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Today is jessica's birthday and she is turnig 6 She walks in the living room to tell her dad its her birthday. Jessica"Dad, Dad guess how old i am today!" Dad "How old?" Jessica"6 dad im am 6". she walks into the kitchen to tell her Grandad Jessica" papa papa guess how old i am today" Grandad"Well for me to know this you would have to take of your panties" as he tells her she did as she was told. her grandad fingers her and smells her panties. He tells her "You are 6 today" Jessica"How did you know" Grandad"I listen as you told your dad in the dinning room".

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What do you get if you convict a white man of murder? A black man in prison.

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how much blondes does it take to fix a light bulb 1 to buy the bulb 2 to put it up and 25 to think about what it does

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing, you should call a local animal rescue number and care to its needs.

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What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

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I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

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Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are potentially dangerous weapons that may inflict bodily harm.

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What was little Sarah's last Words to johnny before he got hit by the bus??? Can i have your ice cream.

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Why did the man yell? Cause he wanted to!

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why did Sarah fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? not sarah

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i got a boner, from looking at you

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Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

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An American, a Mexican, and a black guy all walked into the same bar. Why did the 'BEWARE OF METAL BAR' sign have to be in japanese?!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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