Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours belong in the zoo But dont worrie ill be there Not in a cage But laughing at you

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There are three guys on an airplane, a Korean, a Mexican, and an American. The pilot comes on the speaker and syays,"The plane is to heavy, throw out the thing you have most in your country." The Korean throws out an AK-47 and says,"We have to many of these in our country." The Mexican throws out a taco and says,"We have to many of these in our country." The American throws out the Mexican and says,"We have to many of these in our country."

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You know you have no friends when you steal someone's ALIAS concept and disrespect what is perhaps the most intellectually satisfying form of humour. [L]

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Christopher Reeves walks into a bar.

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What's the difference between dead babies and the holocaust? A lot.

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Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

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What do you do if you see a cat crossing the street? Hit it of course!

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Once upon a time, there were two brothers jumping on a bed. The one stopped because the other fell off the bead and died.

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i saw amango it splootered

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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What is furry, red, and flat? Road kill.

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What did the girl say before she jumped a bridge? "Do you think I can jump off this bridge?"

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mary poppins' handbag is full of fuckin dick

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What did the shit covered people licking each others scrotums call themselves? The Aristocrats

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a bmw? I don't have a bmw in my garage.

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Q:What happened after the snake tricked Adam and Eve into eating fruit from the tree of wisdom? A: Nothing, but the three of knowledge was a whole other story though. Moral Man.

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What did the man say to the cat? I thought you were fake.

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Every circle of friends has a "crazy one". If you can't figure out who the "crazy one" in your group is... Try harder. Either that or you are a terrible judge of character.

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Have u seen stevie wonders new house? No. Niether has he

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What did the black man get for Christmas? Presents

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If the goverment wants us to be eco friendly then why are the eco friendly cars so expensive?

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because dinosaurs died out 65.5 million years ago.

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mirror mirror on the wall who has the most desire of them all? Matt Daly!

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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