Justin Bieber

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Ask me if I'm wearing pants. Are you wearing pants? Yeah.

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Interviewer: Are you currently a smoker? Applicant: Are you implying that I look like a chimney?

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Q: What do Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Crunch, Captain Morgan and Captain Kangaroo all have in common? A: They are all caucasian

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why did the blue berry cross the road

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Why did the black man get a zero on his SAT? He was up so late helping orphans with disabilities that he fell asleep during the test.

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what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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A white man/women works behing the counter at a 7/11

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OMG did you hear about the man who sky-dived from mars?!!!! No…. Me neither

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What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

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No your aunties a joke

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I road a horse to school. My friend stabbed it with a Javelin and screamed.... The horse was his Dad

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Oh you're dating my ex? Do you want my unfinished sandwhich too? And my old shoes? And a couple of my shirts I don't wear anymore? How about a my toys I used to play with? Or my spoiled pickle that's been in my car for about a year and a half after I went to the mall with my friends, we watched a movie, I don't remember which one it was but it was funny, then after that we went to McDonald's and it was the first time I heard of McGangbang and it was pretty good. After that I think we went to Jerry's cousin's house, he was a cool guy until I found out that he likes Tyga, so I ended up never talking to him again.... I went off topic, sorry

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mirror mirror on the wall who has the most desire of them all? Matt Daly!

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What's Worse Than Falling Over? .......Rape.

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How are this and that alike? They aren't.

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Q:What did the midget say to the toll booth operator? A: Is your family dead too?

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A person affected by Alzheimer's is asked a knock knock question- Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Wait what are we doing again?

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What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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How many beavers does it take to paint a house blue? 0, beavers cant paint.

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What the difference between a circle and a triangle? You're an idiot if you don't know the difference.

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Q: What do you call an exact duplicate of Homer Simpson who's been enhanced with numerous special powers and a strength-boosting inducer among other beneficial additions? A: A mobidly overweigth individual who hasn't realized what the phrase, "Go on a diet", even denotes/implies.

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Your momma's so fat, people make jokes about her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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