Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

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Q.What is black and white and red (read) all over? A. A penguin in a blender.

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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what is the difference between a dead baby in a bag and a dead baby hung in the yard....the dead baby hung in the yard was shot down off the cross after being rmr'd

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Your mom is so retard that she needs "special help" from medical professionals. :3 <33

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why was the fork in the wall? Why would a fork be in a wall?

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What's creepy about a loving couple having sex? I made them do it.

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When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

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What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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Where did Susie go during the explosion? On her knees to catch it.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

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'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

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Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

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How do you say the weekend in French? The weekend in French.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

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What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

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eyebrows up means ur flirting this isnt a joke dont laugh

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A man walks into a bar, he then gets a giant bump on his head as he passes out and is rushed to the hospital.

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Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

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Why did the man go to Lourdes Because he has lost all hope

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Your mother is so fat, when she stepped on a scale, it read quite a large number. She resolved to live healthier and exercise more.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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