How do you get a clown to stop laughing? You throw an awe at it. Why did Sally fall off the swing? .....I missed the clown

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A man works at a Doritos factory hes worked there for a few weeks and hes made the most Doritos in his line now and the head of the company gives him a promotion he now runs his own line a few months later the head of the company bob comes back to him and promoted him again to now our friend Carl is head of the Factory about two years later bob comes to Carl and hes promoted to head of the east coast he is head of 27 Factories about a decade later bob asks Carl if when he retires Carl will take over the company and he accepts bobs offer 23 years pass and bob retires Carl is the new head of the company so he is about like 65 at this point and he wants some wine so him and his buddies go for some wine Dan says Carl this lines two long so they decide to have some soda and then Jason says this lines longer then the last one so Aiden says to Carl why don't we go get some punch so they all got into line but there was no punch line a.w. j.p.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats the difference between right and left? I stabbed your mom with my left hand.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face" The horse responds "My daughter has cancer"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Instructions to make origami. 1.) Staple bagels to face 2.) Ask someone else to do it. 3.) Hang yourself because you are too stupid to figure it out yourself

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Who's gay? Justin Beaver

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's worse than leaving the maternity ward with the wrong child? Being a parent.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red, Metal is gray, Justin Beiber, is very gay

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the bear fall down? I shot it. Why did the second bear fall down? It tripped over the first one.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road? Lebron traveled

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you keep black people from your Kool-aid? How? You put it in a safe-deposit box.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why doesn't Michael Jackson play with my brother anymore? Because he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road? It's better if you don't understand

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's more irritating than a half eaten apple? Some prick taking up half the page with shitty copy and past routine.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a black man standing on a podium? Slave trade

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are powerful machines, capable of dismemberment and death when wielded by someone who wishes to cause harm

thumb_up thumb_down -8

When black people wore their pants low, white people called it "Saggin" little did they know that "saggin" spelled backwards is "white supremacy" those sneaky white people

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse being a horse and doesnt understand english is confused and scared by its surroundings it gallops away knocking over a few tables.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why didnt the guy go to work one morning he died in a car accident

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

thumb_up thumb_down -10

your mom is so fat, that your father is no longer attracted to her and it is tearing your family apart.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops