What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What would George Washington do if he was able to talk to all of America? Ask them to dig him up.

How do you starve a black man?.........take away his food!!

whats worse than walking in to the doctors office and he says you got aids heaps of stuff can be worse but haha you got aids

Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

Q: Why did the little girl fall off the swing? A: Hahahaha! I can't read.

How many blonde chicks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to set the house on fire, and the other to call 119.

Two Iranian men walk into a bar and order a Coke and a Lemonade. The Barman said take a seat and he'll bring them over.

what is the difference between hitler and the jews? They had different religions

Roses are red Violets are blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

what did the sock say to the shoe? Get your tongue off me.

A little girl meets a homeless guy named Ian McDermott in downtown Atlanta She then screams stranger danger and a nearby policeman comes and arrests the man.

Paper or plastic? Yes...

Evan Ramsey hahaha go CAD

troll lololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololol.olo90ololol.o.ool.olololol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.o.o.lol.ol.ol.ol.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

OMG I JUST FOUND THE GREATEST WEBSITE YOU SHOULD TOTALLY CHECK IT OUT OMG ITS http://anti-joke.com/submit

Why does Joel's breathe smell?

Yo momma so fat that she was diagnosed with obesity and may need medical assistance in the future and will be reliant on you, her child.

What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

What do you call 50 jewish, homeless men peeing into a river? Pollution.

did you hear about the dyslexic journalist? he employed an assistant to double check his work. They worked really well together.

In America you read books, but in Soviet Russia, it's exactly the same as it is in America, because it's not possible for books to read humans.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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