Its over 9000 penises and they're all raping little children!!!!!

What's worse than putting stones in a blender? Putting a baby in a blender.

i am a slasher, a slasher of prices to get to the other side. poop goo goo gaga

What's blue and wiggles? A baby in a bag

A man got struck by a car and was rushed to hospital on life support, he died shortly after. His wife was informed of his death by the doctors and shortly after she killed her children and finally hung herself.

A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

What do you call a flat-chested woman with a penis? A man.

the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

Sally bought a shakeweight. She is an alcoholic and is ruining her family.

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Love and attention from his parents.

Chuck Norris was so good at karate that he held the middle weight world title for 6 years and was named fighter of the year by Black Belt Magazine. He also used his talents to start a successful acting and advertising career.

Q:Why does poop stink? A: it comes from butts.

A guy walks into a bar. He must have been blind or something.

What do you do when you see four black people and a Jew? You buy them

There is my brain said the English man stop leaving it in the fridge and let me mug you now get in the car OK!

what do you call a million black people on the moon? a good start

Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

Listen Nero, you are the only one I suspect right now, how do you know all of this? Why should I believe you?!

Whats the difference between a boy scout and a jew? A boy scout gets to come home after camp.

Der Ter-Rerks, nern ter serrentersts ers "Terernerserers Rerks", wers er dernerser dert lerved ern der Certersers perrerd. Ert wers er mert erter, prering ern smerler, plernt-erterng dernersers serch ers herdrersers ernd serrerperds. Ert erser hernterd der herned herberver Tersererterps, werd erverderns erf ferts ferned ern der ferserlersed rermerns.

1)Roses are red... 2)5 black men... 3)dead babies walk into a large crowded bar before dissolving into oblivion at the literary incongruency 4)of the whole situation.... 5)yes chicken got to the other side BEFORE me #)stupid chicken (aka duck rose man help....)

Do you like fishsticks? Ya, me too.

Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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