Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He was perfectly happy where he was.

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

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My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

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Why was the man sad He wasnt i lied

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A horse walks into a bar You have been reading so many anti jokes that you can actually anticipate the anti-joke punchline to this joke, because it is one of maybe 3 or 4.

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Yo momma so stupid, she had you.

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Where did Adolf go as a vacation after the war? Hell

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What rude names do you call a girl with no limbs? Anything you want they can't touch you

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what has four legs but cant move? dead dog

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the reason why waldo is hiding from chuck norris is because they are playing hide and seek.

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What did the waffle say when the black guy started eating him? Nothing, because waffles are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

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What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

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What is green and is not grass A frogg

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Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and they smell bad.

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A guy wearing a top hat walks into a bar. He says, "Ow."

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I knew a little girl once. She was ate before she was seven.

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Your moma so ugly she should go see a plastic surgeon.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, monkey do. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Why did the monkey cross the road? Because he saw the chicken do it.

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Have you see stevie wonders house? No. Neither has he.

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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A man walks into a bar. He has a nice drink and leaves.

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How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to change the light bulb and two to file a lawsuit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops