Why was the clock off? Because it was broken

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How did the clown get the baby to stop crying? He hit it with an axe.

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Yo mama so fat that she probably has a thyroid problem.

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Q. why did the girl fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms.

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I had vodka + water and got drunk. had rum + water and got drunk. had gin and water and still got drunk. I've learnt my lesson. NO MORE WATER FOR ME

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? No one knows.

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette are on a cruise together. A horrifying accident occurs, sinking the boat and killing all of them. Their deaths are mourned by their respective family members.

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A black man wearing a belt. Oh, he has a shoelace!

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Who let the dogs out? The dog's owner.

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Q: What did the chicken cross the road? A: "Why did the chicken cross the road?" is a common riddle or joke in several languages. The answer or punchline is: "To get to the other side." The riddle is an example of anti-humor, in that the curious setup of the joke leads the listener to expect a traditional punchline, but they are instead given a simple statement of fact. "Why did the chicken cross the road?" has become largely iconic as an exemplary generic joke to which most people know the answer, and has been repeated and changed numerous times.

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how do you kill justin bieber? put a bag over his head and suffercate him.

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What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Nothing. Blackberries grow on bushes and I do not condone hate crimes.

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How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

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roses are red. violetss are black. a knife would go good in your back

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Why did the chick cross the road? To get to the brothel for hot lesbian love.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Enough.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It escaped.

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

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There was a Jewish man and a German man why was it akward? Because one of them farted

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Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinsons..

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Whats big and blue and white and if it falls from a tree its sure to kill you. A fridge with a denim jacket on.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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Donald Trump

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"is it just me or is it getting really hot in here?" "the house is on fire and we are locked in"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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