Why was a black man in a prison cell? He was a highly respected plumber fixing a prisoner's faulty toilet.

If Irishmen didn't walk out of bars, they would collect and eventually fill the bars of the world and would die given the bars could not support them.

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

What's white and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A refrigerator.

What's the difference between an Elephant and a Post Box? An Elephant is not a Post Box. It is an Elephant.

Why was the Irish Cop happy to see the Mexican family killed in a accident? Because the Lopez family were a family known for generosity and selflessness. It came as no surprise to anyone who knew Steven Lopez and his beloved family that they were all organ donors and not only that but Shelly Lopez, Steven's oldest daughter had blood type O negative (the universal donor). Officer McO'Brianiganly's wife is dying in the hospital in need of a kidney transplant, doctors have given her just weeks to live. Now, thanks to unfortunate events for la familia Lopez., Officer McO'Brianiganly and his wife can live a long happy life together, just as they always imagined.

Why did Suzie get raped? because she was out past her bedtime. and the morale to this story is that its funny to be raped.

Yo mama so dirty when she takes baths there are rings.

why didn't sue come to her son's baseball game? because he doesn't play baseball, he lost his arms in a horrible plane crash. besides, sue died in that accident anyway.

A black, Kenyan man enters a race. He comes in second to last as he didn't practice as much as the other contestants.

What do you call a horse with a missing leg Calling it names could be considered animal abuse and should be reported immediately

A Polish man walks into a bar and says, "Co za asy..."

Why did the chicken cross the road ( The chicken says) I dream of a world where a chicken can cross the road without having morals questioned.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

what is big white and hurts when it falls on you out of tree? A refrigerator

Q:What is your maturity on a scale of 1 to 100? A:69

What did the famer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?!?!

A black car pulls up early in the morning and slows down by your house You see him pull a mysterious object out of his car and point it at you, The paper boy tosses a newspaper at you

Justin beiber comment if u get it

What did the chicken say when it finally crossed the road? - nothing, its a chicken

What did the caterpillar say when he emerged from his chrysalis? I am a butterfly.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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