Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

What did the chicken say to the cow? Cluck cluck Knock knock Who's there Chicken Chicken who? Chicken go cluck cluck, cow go moo Piggie go oink oink, how 'bout you?

How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

Ask me if I'm well Are you well? No

Roses are red , Violets are blue You little dumb ass bitch Ain't fuckin' with yoouuuuuu

What's the difference between an alien and Obama? - Nothing they are both aliens.

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

what is black and hangs from the tree in my back yard? a moldy apple.

How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just two, the mystery is how mice can get inside a lightbulb.

Whats funnier than a dead baby? Pretty much anything.

Jacob Mckeand licks his gooch everynight. Some nights he even covers it in maple syrup. 'mmmmm' he thinks to himself as he licks his 7 inch gooch up and down.

What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

Whats worse the losing your 3 kids, your lovely beautiful wife, and your trusty dog, all your belongings and in a house fire while you're at work? Nothing

Identical jokes get different amounts of votes

What's the difference between a grape and a duck? They're both purple, apart from the duck.

How do you punish Hellen Keller Move the furniture around

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

your mother is so fat that she probably watches her calorie intake every day

Past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense!

hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

Intercom:ALERT! THERES AND EXTREIMEST IS THE SCHOOL! Little kid: Sir, can I borrow that towel on your head? BOOOOOOM!

why was 6 afraid of 7? because seven is a murdering sociopath

Me: "If I had Alzheimers, I would break down into tears." Friend: "Why, you would forget why you were crying..." Me: "Who are you again?"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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