Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

Who cut the cheese? It's sliced so evenly.

Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

so today, i was walking along, and i noticed that it was sunny outside.

Knock knock ... Knock knock ... Little did the man knocking at the door know that the kid was told not to answer the door when he was home alone, so the kid was hiding

Want to hear a funny story? So, these to kids have cancer...

Q: how do you test the sharpness of a knife A: stab someone MR

A German, an Irishman, a Mexican and a Texan are flying together on an airplane over the ocean. When the plane begins to experience engine trouble, they find that there is only one parachute for the four of them! Through an amazing display of flying skill, however, the pilot is able to complete the flight and land safely.

Q: How do you measure a ruler A: You don't.

There are 2 cannibals eating a guy well one starts at the head and the other one starts at the feet the one at the head says to the other on how you doing down there and he said ohhh having a ball you!!!!

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Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

Q:How do you sleep with Paris Hilton? A:You don't. she got herpes.

Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

ask me if im a fence are you a fence WALNUTS!

Sigh, everybody in the world hates me :( Moral: Seven billion people? Realy?

What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

why Is the teen's sock crusty? he stepped in the glue that his little sister was using for her art project.

Why did Chuck Norris eat a sandwich? Because he was hungry.

What did Santa Claus get for Christmas? Santa isn't real.

What do you call a penguin in the desert? Most likely a dead penguin.

Whats the difference between right and left? I stabbed your mom with my left hand.

Q. How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A. Who knows? It's dark!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...