Whats black and red and dead? Nobody could tell, but they were sure that it wasn't a dead black person, so stop being racist!

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Whats fuzzy and pink? A pink fuzz ball

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Imagine that we take all of the elephants in the world and laid them out end to end in space Did you know all of the elephants would die Nature fact

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what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

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A man walks into a bar his alcoholism is tearing his family apart

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A gorilla walks into a bar. It goes on a killing spree, and is promptly put down by animal control.

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Why did the black man have no toes? Because during his climb of Everest, he got frostbite and they had to be amputated.

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Roses are red The grass is green I want you in my bed If you know what I mean.

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Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? Who me? Couldn't be.

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Your mama is so fat but she is also a very kind and friendly person so her weight doesn't bother me at all,

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? On average 2,950, however, this has not been properly tested due to obvious reasons.

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Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability

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you know what? CHICKEN BUTT. butt of chicken ahahahaa

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a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

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What do you call a gay kid, a horrible singer, and has long hair for a guy? Justin Bieber

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How many chickens did Moses bring to the ark? 2

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Why were 50 police officers in the supermarket? A tsunami had struck and they were cleaning out hundreds of bodies

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why did the chicken cross the road? he was stapeled to a cow and the cow got hit by a bus so they died.

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whats worse than a leaf in your bed? World hunger, global warming, the economy......

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Guy 1: "hey look that homeless guy is riding a bike!" Guy 2 " Ya i know and look, there's a dead pro biker other there"

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My mom says to me are you gay and i say are you gay (What did i just do)

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How do you know when an Asian has robbed your house? You have informed the police, who in turn searched the house for DNA evidence, eventually leading them to the criminal, who just so happened to be a troubled Asian teenager attempting to join a local gang.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because dinosaurs died out 65.5 million years ago.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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