Teacher: Why did you fail this test? Student: Because the hamster that gives energy to my brain just died.

"Knock Knock" "Just ring the bloody bell for once!"

this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

What is annoying and uses another language? Spanish class!

How many electricians does it take to fix a light bulb? One

How did the black man fall of the cliff? He was gazing over and realized he had Prostate cancer and fell off the cliif.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food on the other side

What does the fox say? Nothing a fox is incapable of speech.

How did Allen Iverson compose one of the most well known interviews of all time? Practice.

What do you call a kid without any friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

what did the penguin use as a napkin? a napkin

what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

Why can't Hellen keller drive? Because she's a woman.

Why didnt Timmy Go to school? He Died.

I'm so punny.

Santa Claus and eight reindeers walk into a bar. “Hey, fatty,” the barman shouts. “Where’s Rudolph?” “He’s dead,” Santa replied. “I’m sorry to hear that,” the barman said, looking embarrassed. “Let me get you a drink.”

What do you call a Welshman with a stick up his arse? A very odd man

How many retards does it take to screw in a lightbulb? No number of them could figure it out. They sit in the dark for hours, scared of the monsters.

caoimhin is a dorty carrot

Q:what do u call a dead baby tied to my feet? A:new shoes

Roses are blue, Violets are red, Pansies are green, I think I'm colorblind

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Whats green and smells like a red apple? A green apple

Whats funnier than a black man? A black president

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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