A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face" and the horse says "my wife just died of skin cancer."

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What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

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what did eric foreman get for christmas? a foot in his ass.

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Why did Wiggy fall into the toilet? Wiggy was the name of his turd.

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Whats green and has white spots? Idk im asking you

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What does a dishwasher and the holocaust have in common? Not much.

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a guy walks into a bar. he suffered a severe concussion. BECAUSE THE BAR A POLE

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Why did the chicken walk across the road? Because chickens cannot fly

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3 guys get stuck in a island and find indians and the indians say the three guys have to stick 10 of the same fruits up there or they die. The first guy came back with oranges but stops at 3 then gets killed. the second had grapes and stop at 2 and gets killed. But in heaven the first guy ask why did you stop at 2 there grapes. the second guy said he saw the third with a pineapple.

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What did Raymond say when josh ate him? Nothing because Raymond was dead.

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what is the difference between the dead baby and the sandwich? i don't put my penis into the sandwich before i eat it.

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What happened when the man asked the girl if he could borrow her pencil? Nothing, she was deaf

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A guy dared his friend to jump off a bridge for 10 bucks. His friend, fearing for his life did not jump.

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Why didn't Susie do her reading homework? She is blind and her school system cannot Afford to teach her to read braille

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I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

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What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender.

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Why was the old man climbing the flag pole? Because he had Alzheimer, and he was losing his grasp of reality.

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how many people with ADHD does it take to screw in a light bulb? wanna go ride bikes

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What did the asian kid do before he got a blood test? He studied.

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How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

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Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

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What happens when you give a guinea pig a cherry? He turns into satan.

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A: Can I get a tall white Russian. B: No. A: Why not? B: Because this is a Barnes and Nobles. However, we do have a Starbucks, and I can offer you a venti caramel iced coffee"

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What is striped black and white? A prisoner in jail arrested for the murder and rape of a 7 year old child.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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