After going at it for several minutes, the teenager, with a big grin in his face, finally busted a nut during Thanksgiving dinner and was able to remove the walnut from its shell and enjoy it.

Children + my basement + my finger = yes

How did the Mexican got into the USA? Trough the border.

Did you hear about that creepy guy on Facebook? He was un-friended

Why did John not like his chocolate? It wasn't chocolate it was poop.

Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama find a magical lamp. The Genie says, "I will give each of you one wish, and one wish only.." They all wished to be presidents.

Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are powerful machines, capable of dismemberment and death when wielded by someone who wishes to cause harm

A man walks into a bar and sees a depressed looking giraffe. The man says, “Why the long neck?” The giraffe responds, “That’s not the expression.”

A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

Why do zebras have stripes? I don't know.

If the goverment wants us to be eco friendly then why are the eco friendly cars so expensive?

Who didn't allow the gorilla into the ballet studio? Whoever was in charge.

What is the difference between a group of magicians and a cheerleading squad? One has a cunning array of stunts.

what kind of dog can tiptoe

Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

What do you call a deer that has no eyes? I have no eyedeer

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead dive off a motorboat. They are sucked into the propeller and brutally disfigured instantly.

why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

Why does Santa Clause not have any children? Because he only cums once a year.

What's the different between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my penis up your butthole

how many black people does it take to complete the simplest task such as washing their own hair? A shitload! thats why slavery was so populer back in the day. (and gays were big then to because they had to shower together to remember to wash their hair.)

Why couldn't people tell the difference between the two twins? Because they were indentical.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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