One afternoon, a man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my youngest son is gay." the man replies. "Wow that's bad buddy, I'll buy you the drink, on the house." Two weeks later, the same man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my second son is gay." the man replies. "Wow that's bad buddy, I'll buy you the drink, on the house." Two weeks later, the same man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my oldest son is gay." the man replies. "Doesn't anyone in your family like women?." the bartender asks. The man thinks about it. "Yeah, my wife."

What's Great and Danish? The Great Dane Kane.

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

Hey dude. who died.... crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets YO MAMA

NEVER

What do you call a fat kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't he got ran over half way.

What happened when the man asked the girl if he could borrow her pencil? Nothing, she was deaf

What happened to the baby bird? It fell out the nest

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

What did the black guy say to the white guy? Hi!

John: what is blue and goes blub blub Phil; I don't know, what? John: a blue blub blub. What is green and goes blub blub Phil; a green blub blub John: no green blub blubs don't exist, what are you stupid?

What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

Four gay men go to a bar and enjoy a drink celebrating their long lived platonic relationship.

knock knock who's there? nobody. then why are you knocking?

Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A: You murder her friends and family.

What happened when the Asian girl got a B on her report card? She committed suicide

i have a black person in my family tree he's still hanginh

96

A:Whats the air speed velocity of a swallow? B:What an african or English swallow? A:Well I don't know that.

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Someone threw a hippo at the pilot.

Jack and Jill went up the hill....Just kidding, it was only Jill. Jack had no legs

Did you know that... Billy had a heart attack, it was sad. Now you know!

What do I hate? people

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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