A Jewish boy walks up to his father and says: Dad, can I borrow 50 dollars? The dad responds: 40 dollars?!? What are you going to do with 30 dollars?!?

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I think my son might be gay. He's started to listen to Justin Bieber, and last week I walked in on him engaging in penetrative anal sex with one of his friends.

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What do you call a bad yo mama joke? your mom

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The child was fired from his job.

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what happens when chuck norris loses his hokey-bar? your mother

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How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

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I told my friend one of these anti-jokes, he took it seriously and beat my head with a bat.

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How do you know when your pizza is ready? When the oven timer goes off, indicating that it is done.

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What do you call a chicken with the head of a shark? A genetic anomaly.

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A man was caught cross dressing by his wife. She divorced him.

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Whats black and red and dead? Nobody could tell, but they were sure that it wasn't a dead black person, so stop being racist!

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What is white, average height and cannot jump as high as a black man? A fridge.

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Q. Whats the worst soccer team in the world. A. Ass-enal.

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What do Barbra Streisand and Danny Glover have in common? Nothing.

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Your mother is so poor she doesn't have any money!

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Q: how do you get an clown off a unicycle A:You hit it with a police baton

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Whats green and has wheels? A green car.

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what's red and has seven feet? the red man who had seven feet as a result of a serious genetic mutation

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What do you call a girl with no arms and legs? Whatever her name is.

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while in iraq i bought a brand new iphone from the black market...it was only $250....its was doing fantastic until i got a text...i herd a loud beeping noise and the it exploded in my pocket and now i no longer have a penis.

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A Sodium atom walks into a bar. A Chlorine atom bumps into it, taking the electron, then making a bond. Suddenly, the police come in. They arrest the Chlorine atom, of course, but they also arrest the Sodium atom. He says, "what did I do?" The policemen say, "you're too ugly to be out in public."

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Once upon a time there lived 3 polar bears; a mummy polar bear, a daddy polar bear and a baby polar bear. Ond day the baby polar bear said to the daddy polar bear "I don't feel like a polar bear, I'm cold!" and the daddy polar bear said "You look like a polar bear."

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why couldn't the girl make her bed? she is homeless.

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Why was this German dude's water bill so high this month? Because there were thirty dead Jews in his shower. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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