Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

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Why did the car crash? The driver was female.

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Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

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What is the funniest shirt Emil heskey has ever worn? A shirt that had this joke on it

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What's brown and sticky? "A stick?" No, poo.

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"bluar blah blah blarRR/ the stupid pointless part" dead people/ animals/ objects can't talk/ drive/ operate compueter, lol I'm so focken funni

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why was the boy sad? because his mom just punched his hamburger

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Why did he chicken cross the road? The suicide rate in chickens has gone up 50% in the past year alone.

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caoimhin is a dorty carrot

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Where do you find a dead hooker? where you left her.

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Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

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A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are on the run from the police. They see a barn, and decide to hide inside it. They find three burlap sacks, and each hide in one. The police enter the barn, arrest each of the girls, and sentence them to life imprisonment for murder.

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Why did the man cross the road? Because he couldn't get his dick out of the chicken

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What about the cool kids down the block. Their friend just died with a serious health condition.

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How do you put in a lightbulb? Call your local electrition

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jeff Oh hey Jeff, come on in

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Your mother is so retarded. How retarded is she? Very retarded.

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Why did the communist fail his history class? Because he didn't study hard enough.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks the duck "What'll it be?" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck and it can't talk.

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Why couldnt hellen keller drive because she was a women

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Why did the monk shave his head? So he's more aerodynamic.

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Nobody walks into a bar. So nothing happens.

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What's worse than getting raped? getting raped by a horse in car while listening to nickelback

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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