Why Do cats purr when you pet them? I'm actually asking a question there I don't know why.

This isn't funny.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting thrown in to a car and raped violently.

Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

Gay rights.

Why couldn't the teenager go to the pirate movie? He didn't have any money.

Her doctor told her that if she didn't start watching her cholesterol she might suffer from heart related illness in the near future.

If a banana is a vegetable, how come your mother gets confused when I stick pretzels in my butthole?

What did the Black man say to the prostitute? Your job makes the risks of getting AIDs and other STDs much higher than the average person's.

Enough with the gay jokes, they all go one direction.

I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

What do mario and luigi have in common They are both plumbers

All of these jokes are about white people

how do you keep a monkey from stealing your banana? shoot it

roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

Three muffins are walking next to each other in the dessert. The muffin on the right says "Hey now it's my turn to walk in the middle!"

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

Knock knock Who's there? Overused punchline Overused punchline who? The Holocaust.

What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

What is the difference between a Mexican and an a pile of crap? One is disgusting and unsanitary and the other is a pile of crap.

What's fatter than your mum? Your mum's mum

why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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