- Anti Joke

Blonde Girl: Why is this green-painted man throwing forks at me?! Green-Painted Man: It is confusing you, no?

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were driving on a highway. The redhead asked the brunette, who had the map, which was the next exit. The blonde was better with maps so she took it and announced where to go. They made the exit and enjoyed a nice lunch.

Why couldn't Timmy enjoy his ice cream? His lips were sewn together by an evil seamstress who was mad that he stole all of her Pop-Tarts

Your mom's so fat, she's is bigger than the average person.

Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

What happened to the boy with no family? He died in a tragic car accident along with his family

Q: What did the fish say when it swam into a concrete wall? A: Fish don't have vocal cords that allow them to speak in a way discernable by humans, and if they did, it would just sound garbled and bubbly due to their being underwater.

What do you call a deer with only one leg? A one legged deer. What do you call a deer with one leg, one eye and lives in Rome? Still a one legged deer.

Roses are red, violets are red, sunflowers are red, HOLY CRAP, MY GARDENS ON FIRE!

Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? YOU'RE UNDER ARREST! GET DOWN ON THE FLOOR! NOW!

What did the dog get for Christmas? euthanization

Knock Knock Who's there? Your physician, you're going to die.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 beat the crap out of 8.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Blonde Girl: Why is this green-painted man throwing forks at me?! Green-Painted Man: It is confusing you, no?

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

What do black people eat? What everyone else does!

Did you know Helen Keller had a Playground in her back yard? Neither did she.

What is white and weighs twice as much as Shamoo? My ass.

Why did you mom shop at Wal-Mart? She had a coupon

Hey do you have a suitcase? Why? I need one.

Whoever is reading this, I love you and I hope you have a great day.

I have an idea! You leave.

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? hit him in the head with an axe