What do you call a Fly with no wings? Dead.

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Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

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people say i have big feet but you know what the say about people with big feet? :) big socks. sl

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What's more irritating than a half eaten apple? Some prick taking up half the page with shitty copy and past routine.

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Guy 1: (to guy 2) Close your eyes, stand on one leg, spin around, and yell "I have never eaten a cucumber!". Guy 2: No. Guy 1: Ok.

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Why cant the asian find his family? His eyes were too squinty

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Yo momma's so fat she went to Antartica and all the penguins were like, "Woah. You're fat."

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What did the three year old say when he dropped his milk? Shitting buggery!

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scraggle is in you pillow case

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Jews

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Who ever invented the "Knock- Knock jokes" should get a "No-bell prize"

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Why was the man lying under a sheet. Because he was dead.

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What do you call a Black man with a gun ?? A black man with a gun !

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how do you call someone? use a phone

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Two monkeys are sitting in a tree. One monkey looks to the other monkey and says, "I bet I can jump from this tree to the next tree without falling." The other monkey replies, "I'm sure you could. You're a monkey."

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What do you say to a homeless man sat in a train station? That there is a homeless shelter around the corner.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet, If you think Violets are blue you're an idiot because they're called violets for a reason.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Living in Africa.

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Did you hear about the Nun in the Twin Towers? Yeah, she died too

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Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a mission for N.A.S.A.

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A fish didn't walk into a bar, because fish cannot walk.

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Why was the black man in Jail? He works there as a correctional officer.

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What benefits came from the September 11th attacks? None. It was one of the most horrific tragedies in American History

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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