Roses are blurred Violets too I have astigmatism I cant see shit

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What did the boy say to the elders at the senior center? Dayum, you're all ugly!

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Did you hear about that guy? He had a wonderful morning.

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What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

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what happened to your carpool? they died.

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haha women's rights.....what a joke.

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I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

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What did they do with the drunken sailor? Gave him the sack, which meant he could no longer provide for his family.

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Q: What's the difference between a Boyscout and a Jew? A: Boyscouts come home from camp.

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A lil girl walks in to a bar........................ all a sudden a giant purple bunny jump up into her butt... now every time she poops its an easter egg hunt. LBall

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And so he penguin said, The is my most casual outfit!" HAAAW

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Micheal Curran...that is all.

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Why did Hitler Commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed by the fact he had lost World War II.

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A white, black, and Hispanic man walk into a bar at 2:00 in the morning. Unfortunately the bar closed at midnight, so they were charged with breaking and entering, and were sentenced to 2 years in prison.

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What did the cookie ask the glass of milk? Will you wash me down

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what do you call a fat black cat and a skinny white dog? Freckles and Spot

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you: your adopted me: i was so thanks for saying you ass

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what is the difference between a blond and a red head? one is has blond hair and one has red hair

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What happens when you finish a bottle of Sprite? You finish it

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Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

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Well I do want it to end now but...WHAT? How did you get that trough? I thought hypnosis was supposed to increase awareness and focus.

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. The stewardess calls secret service and has the man arrested.

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What's worse than putting stones in a blender? Putting a baby in a blender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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