What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

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Q: What do you call 10 babies at the bottom of the ocean? A: Dead

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Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing set? Because she didn't have any arms.

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What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

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"I see London; I see France..." "Wow. You must have exceptional eyesight."

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Roses are red Violets are blue Everyone on antijoke that steals what I write go to hell My toaster has down syndrom.

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What do you call a black man carrying a T.V? Someone that is helping me move.

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What's sadder than a lost puppy? A dead puppy.

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Steve Jobs is alive.

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What's big fat and hairy? Peter

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Your mother is so dumb, that she had a very poor ACT composite score.

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I met a hot girl in the Tampon aisle and i asked if she wanted to hang out in 5-7 days

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Q: Why shouldn't you walk under a ladder? A: Because it could fall on top of you. Be a reasonable human being and just fly OVER the ladder.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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If a canoe is stuck in a tree with its headlights on, howmany pancakes does it take to cover the roof of my house? False, snakes don't have armpits!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your mom. Just kidding, it's the pizza guy. Pizza guy who?

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Me:Oh wait, I got a joke! Friends:Oh boy, what is it? Tell us! Me:..my grandma died.. *Everyones silent* Some random guy:Oh haha, I get it! Me:Shut up, you have no friends. Some random guy: Oh........

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24

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. The fight began and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing you say when you don't want to fight anymore and you let the other person win?" The other guy says to the challanger, "I give up?" Then the challenger yells. "I WIN!"

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whats orange and cant talk? an orange

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What is the difference between my pet goldfish and an african village? My pet goldfish has water.

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What's white and can't climb trees? Yogurt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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