Did you hear about the kid from Texas? He shot his campus up.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What is worse than getting a cold ? Finding a dead baby in your mailbox

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What happens when you die? Your body gets decomposed by bacteria

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did grandpa fall asleep naked on a bench? Because his mental condition is slowly deteriorating which is causing him to not be able to properly determine what is and isn't ok to do in public.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the old man die? He was old.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are red, Violets are blue, come at me again and I'll punch you

thumb_up thumb_down +21

This is supposed to be an anti-joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What would make African women very happy? food and healthcare for their kids, and a proper education.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Once there was a pig named Poga. When he grew up, he was slaughtered and made into bacon.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q: What do you call Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. A: two things: Their names, and a doctor because they are both in need of a nutritionist.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

knock , knock That Was The Same Mistake That Ann Frank Made.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs. Why did noone help her up? She was fat.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What is a black person's favorite food? It varies from person to person, just as with any race.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? Trees can't jump

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A mexican, Japanese, and American man are eating lunch one day at work by the window. The Mexican says, "Wow! If I get a taco one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The Japanese man says, "Wow! If I get a bowl or ramen one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The American says" If I get grilled cheese one more time, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The next day, the mexican jumped off because he got a taco. Then, the japanese man jumped off for getting ramen. Then, the American jumped off for getting a grilled cheese sandwhich. At the funeral, the mexican wife said, "Oh if i knew he was gonna jump, I would'nt have packed it." The japanese wife said, "If I knew he was gonna jump, I wouldn't have packed it either." The American wife didn't say anything because she was hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What one thing do the five members of Mystery Inc have in common? They were all raped and killed by REAL MONSTERS! One of the monsters happened to be Chuck Norris. He's a BEAST!

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Hold on, please hold on! I will explain, it is my name, but I don't know whats so wrong with it at all... Please give me five minutes, I need to use the bathroom, please don't go just yet, don't be mad at me, what have I done wrong now? I mean if you are gonna go to sleep or something please do not be upset with me.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Your boat breaks down on the highway. How many squirrels does it take to eat a bannana? Squirrels do not eat bannanas but it would probably take a monkey 1.5 milliseconds.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie-pop? zero if you bite it

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's Brown and Sticky? A Stick

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops