A classic (apologies if it's been posted before): A woman was riding the bus home after a day of shopping. Suddenly she jumped up, shouting "may aspirins! My aspirins!" The driver replied: "You probably left them on the counter at the drugstore."

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How many apples does it take to keep the doctor away? 1 if you throw it hard enough! haha

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The average man ejaculates at 40mph, which is why its safer to hit a child at 30mph

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Why are many frogs green? Because yes they are.

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What do you call a duck playing a trombone? Hallucinations

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Why did the man get go to sleep? He got hit in the face with a hammer.

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What did the man say to his friend when he beat him in a game of billiards? Good Game.

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A white, black, and Hispanic man walk into a bar at 2:00 in the morning. Unfortunately the bar closed at midnight, so they were charged with breaking and entering, and were sentenced to 2 years in prison.

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What do you call Chuck Norris being killed? This is impossible so we are not give it a name.

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What did the foreigners do to pass time? They blew up the twin towers.

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What did the cow say to the chicken? - Muuuuhhhhhhhhh!

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What do you call a deer with no eye? NO IDEAR!

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Its over 9000 penises and they're all raping little children!!!!!

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How do you find a jew amoung italians? Through a dollar and see which one whines its not enough!

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Why was the black person playing hockey? Because he found an interest to the sport during his childhood years.

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what is your moms favorite website? Wait did I say mom. Oh I'm not very sorry.

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Color Blind people are so stupid that they can't even see color. I've been seeing color since I was a small child. They are so stupid.

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Why was the little boy late to school Cause he walked on a landmine

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A hero is nice to everyone, but one person. who is that? Your mom. WOOOOOOOT!! YOU JUST GOT MUSCLEMANED!!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause it wanted to

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It was a chilly saturday afternoon coles's brother asked cole to baby sit cole said yes and when his brother left cole proceeded to give it to his niece in the ass. Little did cole know he said his little niece on fire that was the end of his little nieces life.

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Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

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What's worse than a completely overused anti-joke punchline? The Holocaust.

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What do you call a cat with a pop tart for a body and rainbows flying out of its butt? Nyan Cat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops