Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are powerful machines, capable of dismemberment and death when wielded by someone who wishes to cause harm

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

A man came home and witnessed his wife having an affair with another man. The husband and wife got into a huge argument and eventually got divorced

What do you get if you put a baby in a blender? An Erection

Friend: how obsessed are you with harry potter on a scale from 1-10 Me: 9 and 3/4

Why does austin bell like it up the butt? Cause he's a cat a kitty cat meow meow meow and meow meow meow

What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

What is green and if it fell on you from a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

Who's gay? Justin Beaver

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

What do you call a deer that has no eyes? I have no eyedeer

What do you call a hairy pussy? A cat.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him "why the long face?" "All horses have long faces" he replied.

What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

Q: When did the man realize it was 5:00am? A: When it became 5:00am.

What's worse than Monkey Ball? Super Monkey Ball. What's worse than Super Monkey Ball? The Holocaust.

What's more disturbing than finding an apple in your worm? The fact that you're eating a worm.

No your aunties a joke

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a florist.

Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

Q How is it Going Patty? A:Hi Patrick hows it going?

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

What do you call a black midget in space? The first true example of how hard work, dedication and sacrifice can help you to achieve your goals.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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