Why did the duck cross road? It didn't, it got ran over.

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Q:How do you kill Chuck Norris ? A:You don't , He kills you first.

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I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

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Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

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Why did'nt the puppy eat it's food? Because it was made up of little bits and peices of it's family.

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Why did the little boy throw rocks at his sister? ...Because she has cancer.

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I'm Andrew Schmitt

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Give one reason for not visiting a hotel. Basil Fawlty is the manager.

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what happens if you fart to hard? A.you shit yourself

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why was one black guy surrounded by ten white guys...... he was a story teller.

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whats the difference between harry potter and a jew? harry potter can escape the chamber

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How do u kill a black man You don't or else u will get intouble for murder but u can if u want there r many ways

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3 guys walks into a park. Which one was holding the beer? None, all 3 guys were elementary kids

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How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

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How do you teach a blond how to cook? You give her a cookbook, a kitchen, and maybe turn Paula Dean's show on.

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What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

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What do you get when you skin a potato? A screaming kid with autism and no skin.

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A black man is driving a nice car when he's suddenly pulled over by the police. "Do you know why I pulled you over?" asks the cop. "No officer" replies the black man. "You have a taillight out. However I'm going to just let you off with a warning because you seem like an upstanding citizen. Have a nice day."

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What do you call a black person that flies a plane? A pilot you racist BITCH! Its ok a niggah gots altititude.

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girl. have you seen my duck man. yes he is with me right now girl rely you have him man. yes in my diner girl. d.i.c.k. man.f u

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why do black people like watermellon? becasue it is a delicious red fruit at a wonderful price

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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How do you cause ultimate pain to a imprisoned Jew during the holocaust? Moral: You give him an apple WITH a worm in it.

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What do you get when you cross a shark and a squid Nothing thats impossible

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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