Remember how I made you hypnotically cum by poking your own nose last time? When I told you that hypnotic story about the astrologer and the brain surgeon? So you wet yet? Think about how easy its going to be for me when I take out Mr.Big and slap down your coffee table with it, yeah... Feels cozy down there does it not?

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Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

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A student asks a teacher: Sir, how much time would it take for me to do this quiz. Teacher says: From the second I give you this test to the second you hand it back to me.

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J- Jiggly E- Enormous S- Sad S- Smelly E- Ethiopian

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What's funny about a small child with no arms, no legs? Nothing.. Nothing at all.

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What's black and White and black and White? A nun falling down a stairs

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An American, a Mexican and a Cuban are in a car. For they are heading to the store to buy groceries and then come home to make dinner.

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A man from timbuktu slept on a bed of nails. It was very uncomforable

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what happened to the slut last time she opened her legs. a bee flew in and stung her. turned out she was deathly allergic. she died a painful death.

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What's worse than a dead baby? What a sick question. Most would argue that nothing is worse than the death of an infant.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face" and the horse says "my wife just died of skin cancer."

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Whats black and white and red all over? Genital Warts...

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Gullible is not in the dictionary Yes it is

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Your momma so stupid, she dropped out of school at a young age of 12.

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Q. What do you call a black pilot A. A pilot

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How do you know when an Asian has robbed your house? You have informed the police, who in turn searched the house for DNA evidence, eventually leading them to the criminal, who just so happened to be a troubled Asian teenager attempting to join a local gang.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle.

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he has no arms.

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The diamond one below is hilarious.

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What did the little girl get for Christmas? A pipe bomb

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what did the red rock say to the blue rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk.

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What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

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The Pope walks into a bar, the barman says: "What'll it be, Pope?" But the Pope's knowledge of English is tenuous at best. He mumbles something in Latin that the barman doesn't understand. The Pope becomes frustrated and leaves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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