What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Nothing. I killed them both with a fire axe and proceeded to kill all the patients in the hospital.

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Your mother is so fat, she appeals to my secret fetish.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an orange and finding a worm.

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How are grapes and squirrels similar? They're both purple. Except for the squirrel.

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Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

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Q: What did the horse say to the other horse? A: Nothing, Horses are incapable of making verbal communication therefore they cant speak to each other.

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" Whats the deal with airline food? " -Sharon

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What do you call a chicken with no head? A chicken with no head.

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Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

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What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

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what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

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What do you call a woman in the kitchen? Her name.

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What did Sherlock Holmes say when he saw a very pretty lady? Hello

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Roses are red, Here's something new. Violets are violet, Not f***ing blue.

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An anti-joke

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knock knock. who's there? your neighbor. o hi come one in!

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What do you call a girl who can run faster than me? Virgin

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Hey dude when is 4th of July? I don't know.

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What's worse than losing your job? Getting repeatedly hit in the face with a brick after getting fired from your job.

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don't take life to seriously nobody gets out alive

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WHat did the Somalian girl get for Christmas? AIDS

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What does the blond say when she walks out of the salon Nothing, she is hit by a car, and promptly goes into a coma and hasnt said anything since

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who's a knob,a liar, and systematically ruining a once well-run family football club by employing crooks , buying footballers who are well-passed there sell-out date and getting the team relegated ? steve kean not laughing ? nor are 23 ,000 others

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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