Yo mama so short she often has to ask you to retrieve items from the top shelf of her cabinet.

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How do prevent a nun from walking through a revolving door? Put a spear through her head.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Um...thats impossible because chickens live on farms theyre are no roads....

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When were in a zombie apocalypse I will make sure to save you for 40 days and then I will sacrifice you

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Why did the kid cross the road? To show his friends that he had guts. And man, did he have guts.

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Two drunk drivers got in a car crash They both died

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69.

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Why did the fat guy pick up a noodle from the floor with his buttcheeks? He felt like pasta.

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Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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A guy said a racist joke and he got beat up now he is in the hospital for what he said.

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Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

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What do you tell your friend who has been cheating on his wife? You're a terrible human being, and she deserves better!

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

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Hoverboards are still not available, and it's already October 21, 2015...

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Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

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What do you call a black woman working at a bar? A Bartender. What do you call an asian woman working at a bar? A Bartender.

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What do you call five black me pushing a car? "Very nice young men who helped me when I broke down," according to my grandmother.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? The IRS. All your base are belong to us.

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Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

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what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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