how do you keep a monkey from stealing your banana? shoot it

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roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

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What do mario and luigi have in common They are both plumbers

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Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting thrown in to a car and raped violently.

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This isn't funny.

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Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

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Why didn't the scientist discover a cure for apathy? He simply lost interest in it.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? I don't know. I'm paralyzed.

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Why couldn't the teenager go to the pirate movie? He didn't have any money.

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Why wouldn't Rose let go of Jack? Freddie told her that he was just a poor boy and nobody loves him.

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A Hispanic man, an African woman, and a Caucasian man walk into a bar. No one wins this round of "Racial Equality Appreciation Day's" game of limbo.

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Enough with the gay jokes, they all go one direction.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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What did the Black man say to the prostitute? Your job makes the risks of getting AIDs and other STDs much higher than the average person's.

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If a banana is a vegetable, how come your mother gets confused when I stick pretzels in my butthole?

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No antijoke here.

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Knock Knock! Who is there? I am the milkman and I have your milk.

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What can bankrupt people buy? Free stuff.

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If Chuck Norris were to be hit by a train he would die

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Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? He is short and finds it difficult getting from place to place.

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Why did the man murder his wife? Because she would'nt do the the dishes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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