a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse does not say anything because its a horse and horses cannot talk.

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What do you get when a fat kid eats a donut... A Heart Attack.

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Your mom is so fat, she had a heart attack and died. It was very sad and she will be missed.

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Why do black people like fried chicken? Because it tastes good.

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What do you call a one legged , one eyed, canadian fisherman called Samuel Browning? Mr Browning unless you are on friendly terms then Sam is fine.

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What was the only reason a ginger ever won in a fight? It was against a Dementor.

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A man once had a monkey, and it made him very happy. then one day, his monkey ran away. So the man was very sad and screamed, "I knew i should have broken the monkey's legs!!"

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Q: Whats A Schoolbus Full Of Black Children??? A: A Rotten Banana!!!

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

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your mom was so fat that she died.

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What did the german speech therapist say to his mute patient? There a few methods we can use to help you obtain the power of speech.

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Two women are sitting on a park bench, minding their own business, saying nothing.

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What are you going to get your mom for mothers day? I have two gay dads.

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How can you treble the value of any Skoda car? Ensure its paintwork, upholstary, floor, lights, wipers, steering wheel, brake, horn, CD player, radio and clutch are clean and/or sound; fill its petrol tank, oil, brake and winscreen wiper fluid reserves; fit a roof rack; include a red triangle, a fire extinguisher, a blanket and a first aid kit in the sale; take out comprehensive insurance and pay a year's road tax and MOT before selling it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was at a crosswalk and the walk light was on.

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How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Let's ride bikes!!

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A man walks into a bar. He then walks out of the bar a while after. He then goes home and goes to bed. And then he goes to sleep. And then in an odd time travel paradox,a T-Rex arrives from the past and kills him and his entire family.

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Nero Octavios reporting, so far all of our sectors worldwide excluding Spain, Italy and Ground Zero are secure, Nero Augustus is severely wounded but will make it, and despite the our intel Necrissa Angelo is alive and well. We have one single worry though Nero7 the brunt force of the terror attack was large and powerful, yet resistance was incredibly light when we went for the counter-strike, too light, we might have to ready ourselves for some sort of reprisal here.

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A man jumps of the roof of his building. The superindentant now owns the building and the man who jumped off the building has 59 fractures. Oh and he died.

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September 11 was the 9/11 of all terrorist attacks.

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A loving father took his two children to the park for a picnic. while the children went into the lake for a swim he drowned them both

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Roses are red, violets are blue, my name is cartman, kyle you're a jew

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

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Two antennas falls in love. They get married. The wedding was horrible, but the reception was great.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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