What's worse then failing a math test? Your mom getting shot

How dou you find the population of mexico? Take a census....... By throwing a dime in the street!

What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

Why was the baby crying? Because he was tied to a railroad track. How did the baby die? He had a bomb strapped to him. How did the bomb explode? It got ran over by a train.

two mormons missionaries knock on a door they are welcomed into the home and treated with kindness later the family is baptized. the mormons return home with a sense of accomplishment and purpose.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. wow i missed the entire purpose of this.

What did the black man say when he jumped in the pool? The water's nice, you should join me.

A black guy and a mexican get into a car Who is driving? Whoever takes a seat in the drivers side of the car

How does Helen Keller play the piano? With one hand.. She needs the other hand to sing.

whats the difference between a fat person and a skinny person ? there weight.

Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

What's the meaning of life? I forgot to write it down.

Why do gingers get mad when people call them gingers? Because it hurts their feelings

What's pink, bubbly, and goes round and round? A baby in a microwave.

Why don't they have any badminton courts in the jungle? There just isn't the demand.

How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

Sarah: Knock knock. Jim: Who’s there? Sarah: It’s me, Sarah. Open the door. Jim: It’s me Sarah open the door who? Sarah: Please Jim, it’s freezing out here. Jim: That wasn’t a very funny joke, Sarah. Sarah: Shut the fuck up and let me in. Jim: Ok.

Why is Stevie Wonder called Stevie Wonder? Wonder where I am.

I wouldn't consider the Titanic sinking to be a disaster, ????It is better down where it is wetter under the sea! ????.

What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Can I have a pound for my bus, pal?

In Soviet Russia, blonde is smart

Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

rodents are bed violents are glue i have lysdexia and short attention spa

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...