when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

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What separates man from animal? Divorce.

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An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

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What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

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Chuck Norris never shows emotion!!!... because he is a pragmatic person and thinks in a more logical manner.

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Why was the lady afraid of rocks? Because her husband was stoned.

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why does the pie have apples in it? it was apple pie.

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How do you kill a hobo? Throw a penny off a clif.. How do you kill another hobo? Tell him the penny's still down there

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What do you call a group of white males wearing hoods and setting fires? Cold

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What's the difference between a bench and a black man? The black man is alive.

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A man walks off a bus. How did he get on top of it in the first place?

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The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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What happens when 4 friends throw an egg into oncoming traffic, they hit a fire hydrant!

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-Is your refrigerator running? -Yes. -Just wondering.

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Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

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Why does the kid cries when he sees me? Cuz i took his lollypop last week.

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Why did the cow fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second cow fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first cow.

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what did the deaf guy say when the poor man asked how life was? the deaf guy didn't respond considering the fact that he was deaf and would never interact with a poor man.

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What's cold, tired, wet, and starving? A girl up at 4:00 am that just came out of a cold shower.

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"Lassie, Lassie, come quick! Timmy is in the well!" "I'm a dog," replies Lassie. "You folks have ropes, ladders, and opposable thumbs. What the hell could I possibly do to help?" With that final act of disobedience, Lassie was turned into fertilizer.

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So there were these three guys on a plane, one with a ruptured hernia, one with a stomach infection and one with a raging case of gingivitis. Half way through the flight the pilot said, "unfortunately we will not it make to our destination... we are crashing." The three men then went to get the parachutes. they then say that there was only two. the man with the ruptured hernia picked one up and threw it out the door and pushed out the guy with the stomach infection. The guy with the raging case of gingivitis said, "why did you do that... we could have used that parachute!" the man with the ruptured hernia responded, "taco." and jumped out of the plane. the pilot then goes on the intercom and says," sorry. false alarm. we will not be crashing, please enjoy the rest of your flight."

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What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was Hellen Keller.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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