John: Hey Debbie, do you wanna go see a movie with me? Dina: My name is Dina

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A horse walked into a bar. The bar was part of the fence he was enclosed by.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream...?? Because he got hit by a white van

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Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

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What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

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What's worse than losing your phone? 9/11

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Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

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How many retards does it take to screw in a lightbulb? No number of them could figure it out. They sit in the dark for hours, scared of the monsters.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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Why are black people like trees? Because they fall down if you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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Q:What did the duck say to the other duck A:We are both ducks

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Why was the man walking down the street late at night? Because he's homeless and has nowhere to stay.

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Why did the boy throw the clock out of the window? Because it was broken.

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Why was the black family eating at K.F.C? The food there is really good and they had a discount on the family bucket.

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Why was Yabba annoyed? Because the idiots who do the audio description voiceover for Timmy Time on BBC iPlayer frequently refer to her as a male even though she is clearly a female duck.

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Knock Knock I have a f*cking doorbell you asshole

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Violets are blue and/or violet Roses are red so's my blood, see?

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What do Ethiopians do on Fridays? Starve.

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An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

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Go away nothing to see here,. I said go away

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bite me

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A Jewish boy walks up to his father and says: Dad, can I borrow 50 dollars? The dad responds: 40 dollars?!? What are you going to do with 30 dollars?!?

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Why was Mary's turkey dry on Thanksgiving dinner? Because she left it in the oven too long.

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So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops