Why didn't Sammy Robertson make the world series catch to win the series in 1977? Because Sam, like many many discouraged teens in America, didn't follow his life long dream and later became a janitor at his hometown middle-school.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

you're momma's so fat, and i like fat chicks. is she home?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

You had 10 bricks on an airplane, you throw one. How many do you now have? 9. How do you get the elephant in the fridge? Open the fridge put the elephant in. How do you get the giraffe in the fridge? Open the fridge, take the elephant out, put the giraffe in. There was an animal meeting, all animals were invited. Which animal was missing? The giraffe, because he's still in the fridge. An old woman wants to cross a river that was full of crocodiles. How does she cross without getting eaten? The crocodiles were at the animal meeting, so she got across safely. She dies anyways. What happened? She was hit by the brick.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Eight, because there's one tickle per tentacle!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

roses are red violets are blue the sugar bowls empty so is your head

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's brown and sits in the woods? Winnie's poo

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a Welshman with a stick up his arse? A very odd man

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why couldn't the black man get his lawnmower to start? He was too poor to own a home =)

thumb_up thumb_down -1

An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the amputee get for chritmas? A bicycle

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I felt like kicking something.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

roses are red violets are blue i'm chinese and i don't know a joke pickle.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a fish with no I Defected at birth

thumb_up thumb_down -1

hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why can't Hellen Kelller drive? Because she's a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

An African-American is working on math problems and notices an Asian man walking by. The African American asked,"Could you help me out on these math problems?" The Asian man replied, " I have never been good at math."

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender gives him a drink. The man walks out of the bar. He drives home and slaps his wife. Alcohol is destroying his marriage.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q:Why couldn't little Bobby read the bible? A: His parents weren't into religion and he was blind

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats green and miss centowski hates a gas chamber :D lets be friends

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops